Intimacy is key to a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

Intimacy isn’t just about sex. It’s about connection to the person you love. It’s touch, its words of affirmation, its acts of service, and giving them your undivided attention. Just the simple act of a hug or a kiss can make your day better. When my last relationship ended I knew wanted someone who I could have that connection with since that was something I didn’t really have for years, so I put that in my dating profile. My girlfriend Krysta apparently thought it was adorable because we matched and we’ve not gone more than a day without each other since we met.

I look forward to going to sleep with my partner and snuggling up with them. Nights in watching TV or a movie usually mean cuddling up under a blanket and sometimes accidentally falling asleep on the couch. There’s nothing better than coming home after a long day and being welcomed with affection. I don’t have to worry anymore about being pushed away by my partner because I wanted to show them some affection.

On a scientific level, physical touch releases tons of “feel good” chemicals in our brains that make us feel better, healthier, lower stress, and form lasting bonds with each other. When you’re in a relationship that’s lacking intimacy it makes you feel alone, even if you’re getting laid once in a while.

I love seeing Krysta’s face light up when she comes home from work and gives me a big hug or when I come in from my office and tell her I’m done working for the day. Even when the days are hard and it feels like everything is going wrong it’s so much easier to handle knowing that she’s here for me. Some of the most memorable moments with her have just been nights where we’re listening to music together, cuddled up on the couch after a long day.

The point I’m trying to make is that if you’re in a relationship where intimacy isn’t there, do something to try and fix it. What’s the point of being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t want to share intimacy with you? I’ve been there before and will never do it again as long as I live. I’m thankful that I had a chance to find someone who appreciates the importance of this kind of intimacy. I know I feel a lot better not having to “compromise” on something that is important to any relationship.

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